Last night was our first night at home without any parents and it was just Tony and I to fend for ourselves. This proved to be a little scary, and yet felt so nice. As we sat and watched tv, I made a quick dinner of leftovers and we settled in for the evening. It felt almost normal except I would look over every once in a while and would see all the bandages covering where his hand used to be. Then fear would overcome me and I would think, can I do this alone with out any parental figure near me? I haven't felt like such a child in a very long time. I very much felt as though I was playing dress up and this wasn't really my house nor did I have a real job let alone the capabilities to take care of Tony. When in all reality, all these things are true. This is my home that we have worked so very hard to buy, I do have a real job (admittedly, not a great paying job in this economy but I wear skirts, makeup and blow dry my hair most days which qualifies me as a professional in some peoples eyes) and I am a smart girl. I am a very capable 37 year old woman who is fiercely independent and is absolutely capable of such feats, I just needed to breath deep and know that we can get through this.
Now some things have changed for sure, like we were nestled in bed by 8:41pm and Tony really does just have one hand, but for the first time in a month, we were falling asleep in our own bed holding hands and feeling like any other married couple. The only difference is that we just lived through a full blown traumatic nightmare and have come out the other side. Lets just hope we stay on that other side.....
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
You can do this together as you have done so many other things together, although nothing as scary or challenging as this......marriage takes us to new levels of love and caring. You both have real jobs and you both have a beautiful house and each day is a reminder of what you do have and how hard you both worked to get those things. Even more beautiful than those material things is the love you share with one another. It is hard to understand how this could happen to two such wonderful people, but somehow we know that you will get through this with your deep love for one another and the support and love from your family and friends. It is important to look back a couple of weeks and realize how far you have come from 2-3 weeks ago...it does not make it any easier, but at least you can look at how Tony has improved and 2-3 weeks from now he will be that much stronger and those scars and wounds will begin to heal. The scars and wounds you carry inside will also take time to heal so try and be patient with yourselves and one another to allow healing. Know that we love you so much and we are just a phone call away and about 5+ hours and we can come at any time if you need us or if you just think you might need us....we are here for you both. Take care, Love Mom & Dad
ReplyDeleteWelcome back guys. Do you want me to bring over a hot dish to put some meat on that boy's bones?
ReplyDeleteYou are right on Tina. You've already displayed enormous strength and there is more to lean on. It may not always feel like it but I know it is there. Should you ever feel like you are getting weak kneed lean on your friends and family - we are here for you. Then you'll be solidly back on your feet for whatever is next.
ReplyDeleteYou are doing an amazing job.
Love,
Chris