Said goodbye to our old friend Butchdog.

Above is a picture of our dog Butch's last Sonic hamburger yesterday. Tony and I both knew this day was coming (I have thought this days was coming for 12 years!) and yesterday was Butch's time to say goodbye. This past week during Thanksgiving, he back finally gave out and Tony and I were taking turns carrying him everywhere as his back legs were too wobbly to hold him up. We knew it was time, but had to wait until 5PM yesterday to get an appointment with out vet. We decided together that he loved Four Corners Riversports (Tonys shop he co-owns with Andy) that we wanted to put him down there so he could spend his last night peg-legging around saying good bye to the shop kids as well as customers. Most of the day he layed on his bed in front of the heater, but would wag his tail generously when folks came up to say goodbye to him.

I got Boodog when I was just 23 years old and have never had to put a dog down before, so this was a very hard experience for me. Bree and I just started a new Big Brothers/Big Sisters volunteer program yesterday from 3-4 so I knew I had to hold it together at least through Study Buddies before the deed was to be done. As soon as I pulled up at the shop at about 4:45, the tears started and didn't stop until well into the night.

Tony being the strong husband that he is, supported me through the whole thing. We both held his head in our laps and stroked his fur (hmm, would I call it fur as it is about the bristliest "fur" I have ever pet) until he slowly faded away. I think this brought all kinds of emotions to the surface for both of us and it proved to be a long night. I woke up this morning wanting to ask Tony is he let Butch out, but then my memory came back of the previous night and I held back the tears. As I sit in my cubicle, I am trying to hold it together while Bree keeps it all together for me.....

Thanksgiving Healing Picture

Always with a smile on his face no mattter how small that smile is. Thanksgiving with the Miely family was fantastic even if their was a few meltdowns from Kahne (present overload) and myself (to much food and being overtired like a 3 year old!). Today, some Christmas shopping and window shopping to begin the quest of exchanging our cars for automatics so Tony can drive them (have stick shifts unfortunetly, and those days are over for us for a while). Happy Thanksgiving to everyone and we hope that everyone can feel our love from afar!

Holidays.

Just the other day I woke up and realized the holidays were not just looming upon us, but are actually here. It feel as though it was just the other day that I was walking back and forth from the hospital to my hotel every day and before I knew it, I was dragging Christmas decorations out of my attic and laying them out for review. With our attic being the size of a bowling alley, it seems as though there are more and more boxes filled with "treasures" each year. The stair case is a pull down situation and is a treacherous feat even with two hands and a fully healed body. As I thought about pulling the staircase down and was calling to Tony, I realized how difficult this years holiday chores would be. Usually, Tony goes up and kind of hands the boxes down to me, and I grab them and hope to safely land them on the ground. This year it was going to be a bit different and I wasn't looking forward it. I climbed the wobbly staircase and ventured to hand down the first box....Tony reached up with his one hand and balanced the box filled with matted looking garland and eased the mildewy smelling box to the ground. We proceeded this way for some time until we both took at look at the 9 ft. tree still in its box with sale pricetags from the previous year clinging to its dusty sides. We kind of looked at one another and at the same moment said, "Maybe we can wait until Bree comes over to help with this one."

We both realized that things that we used to take for granted are not quite gone, but are certainly different in the way that they are handled. Your perspective on things is altered and life shifts in different directions. People you would have thought to be right by your side are not and ones that you never suspected cared so much have lent more than a shoulder to cry on. For the most part, we both feel fortunate for not only our such dear close friends and family, but that the hand we were dealt (wait...guess I can't use that one anymore can I? I just made myself chuckle a bit....) was not more of a severe blow to our life. With happiness for one another in our hearts, we look forward to each new crossroad as an adventure in our lives together whatever hand we are dealt....(I couldn't resist that!)

Denver doctors visit...

Tony and I headed to Denver this past Monday to see a two different doctors (as well a

a band!) which was just so fantastic. We met with a new prosthetics doctor on Tuesday as well as met with Tonys surgeon that afternoon. Both were very impressed with how well

Tonys is healing both physically and mentally. His arm as well as his leg skin grafts are healing quite nicely and he has begun to run a few days

a week. This is a new sport for Tony, but like everything else, he will be a fantastic runner (out running me for sure) quickly. We were able to see our good friends Ben and Maaike for dinner on on Tuesday which brought smiles to our faces and warmed our hearts. Not only in Durango do we have such a wonderful support syst

em, but it seems we have friends all over sending love and support our way. This has helped more than I can say for us to move forward and begin to learn how to live this new life we have. It is the small things that we are challenged with (having to swap out all of our vehicles for automatics!)but we are getting through them together with friends and family.

Again, thank you to all who continue to support and love us across the country!

Running can hurt ones legs....

The snow is falling outside and the flakes are the size of baseballs here in Durango. It is just so pretty I don't even know what to do. This has been such a good week for the two of us and we are moving forward in such positive steps. Tony has been at work at least a few hours everyday and his pain level seems to be decreasing each day. As time passes, we are both learning how to live this new life and to take joy in the life we have been given. Knowing how bad things could have been and what kind of changes could have easily been handed to us, we are thankful each day.
Our friends across the country and support here in Durango is overwhelming and brings tears to both of our eyes often. The way the community has sort of rallied around us, calling, planning benefits for Tonys prosthetics, checking in and asking how we are is simply amazing. Many of our friends from around the country have discussed coming out for the benefit to support us and I cannot even say how much that means to us. My business partner, Bree has worked non-stop allowing me time to be home with Tony as much as possible and his partner at work has been doing the same. These selfless acts bring tears to my eyes as I know that in this economic climate, it is not easy for anyone to say the least.
We are flying to Denver on Monday of this week to meet with some prosthetic specialists and Tonys surgeon (and catching an early show for some fun!) and hoping to know a little more about how to proceed with the idea of a prosthetic. We are not sure how long this will take, how many fittings, or honestly anything about prothetics so it will be fantastic learning experience.
On a lighter note, Tricky Kitty (my all girls band) has found a guitarist and we are starting to ramp up our practice schedule for January 9th! So much fun!!

First day on his Cruiser bike!

I took this picture on Saturday morning before Tony and I took a little bike ride along the river trail here in Durango. If you check out the right side you will see he has rigged up a "cup" type of thing to put his arm into for steering and his buddy welded a piece that fits onto his handlebars.

We rode for a few miles before turning around heading back to Four Corners. It was fantastic for us to be outside together riding bikes!

moving forward

This has been a good week for Tony and I. His sister Jenny came down and it was so nice to have her to ourselves for three and a half days! She cooked and cleaned and spent a lot of time with Tony allowing me to go to work and band practice and not have to worry to much about him. We have gone down to every other week for doctors visits which is fantastic and Tony is at physical therapy twice a week now working on getting some motion back in his wrist. There is not a ton of movement there and it has been a little frustrating for him, but we are getting there slowly but surely. After meeting with another fellow here in town who also lost his hand and part of his arm in an accident, Tony was inspired and I think he left that meeting with fresh hope in his soul which of course, makes me happy and makes my heart sing. This gentelman, Rich, showed him how he has his mountain bike set up and gave Tony all kinds of encouragement and hope that indeed he would be back doing everything he loves doing in just a few short years.
We are both very excited for the benefit party being held here in town at Ska Brewing on January 9th and it seems as though there may be quite a few folks showing up for it from out of town so that will be very exciting (even if it is a bit overwhelming!). My all ladies band Tricky Kitty is getting all geared up for this event as it will also be our first "concert" and we are just so excited for it to be for Tony. He is still the hottest guy in town that all the ladies love!!!